When Inner Martha Kicks In

I repent from my self-sufficiency.

My lack of quiet time this week has led me to be less conscious of God’s presence. I did open my Bible and study His Word but it was for the purpose of our curriculum write up and dgroup lesson. I didn’t spend time to enjoy God’s presence, but to prepare Bible studies for others. I did watch several youtube videos and listened to podcasts, but those are not the same with sitting down and having a date with the Lord.

After yesterday’s (Friday’s) Bible study, I found myself critical of the two HR employees whom I found staying at the reg booth, eating donuts with crumbs falling between the pages of the attendance sheet I prepared. It was 4:10 pm in the afternoon and people are still not in the respective rooms. I asked the two girls why are the attendees still not inside the room. They answered, “We’ve been calling them but they still won’t come.”

At the back of my head, I was thinking, what kind of excuse is that? Both of you are eating donuts instead of calling people to be on time for the Bible study. The facilitators are volunteers. They don’t get paid for what they do. They purposely take leaves from work just so they can teach here. And the only thing we can give them is respecting their time. 

But God rebuked me.

My inner Martha kicked in. Always trying to make things perfectly planned for a good cause, but forgetting what really matters – the heart.

I was so busy ensuring the employees arrive on time. I was busy making sure everyone was fed with donuts and coffee, but forgot to even pray days before and hours before, which I always did.


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